You Will Act Like The Person You Perceive Yourself To Be

I used to be a depressed piece of shit - plain and simple.

I would lie, be mean, manipulate, and blow up easily.

However, I acted that way because I wanted to be that way.

My high school years brought on some suffering in life, and I made the unconscious decision that that was going to be who I was from then on.

I was a mistake who deserved to be sad and have bad things happen to him.

This was a slippery slope. Suddenly, everything around me was reaffirming that identity.

Bad things continued to happen to me, people kept doing me wrong, and I felt like I had zero control.

What I was putting into the world was coming back to me.

But I didn't realize that I had put those glasses on myself - the glasses that gave me perspective of the world.

When I tell you a switch flipped the day I realized that..

I've never looked back since.

I was choosing to identify with things that only brought more suffering. It convinced me I was stuck in a loop, even though the exit was right next to me the whole time.

Once you realize that you choose what to identify with, life becomes a completely different game.

Identity

Perspective

"I'm a Scorpio,", "I'm depressed", "I'm a liberal".

"I am" statements have much more power than we think they do.

They put a pair of glasses on you, and you now see life as someone who's depressed, scorpio, etc.

The more times you affirm that identity, the stronger your prescription becomes. The stronger it becomes, the more you depend on it.

In time, you forget that you're even wearing a pair of glasses - you need them to see, so why would you take them off?

You are the way that you are, and that's how the world works.

These start so early in life as well.

Kids are told that they're "bad at school", have ADHD, or are slow learners.

6-7 year olds are so susceptible to information - they don't know how to reasonably question things.

They don't even have an opportunity to know anything other than those identities. It's who they are, and there's no point trying to change them.

I would argue that about 90% of issues that people face have more to do with identity than the actual issue (my hot take that I'll write more about sometime).

Playing the role

The depressed person will force sadness at times to keep up with their identity (I know that I did). A Scorpio might not date a Gemini because they're not compatible.

Once you have your glasses on, life becomes a constant test to see if you actually live up to that identity.

Whether consciously or subconsciously, you will dramatize to make sure you're fitting the title.

You will act like the person that you perceive yourself to be.

You're given a set of rules, and you need to follow them - that's just how your brain works.

But you don't need to play along.

You choose what to identify with.

You can identify with everything, or you can identify with nothing at all. As long as you have made a conscious decision to do it that way, that's great.

However, if you haven't begun to look at them, I urge you to start there.

The power is in your hands to decide how you see the world and yourself.

You're not giving a list from birth that cannot change. You're not given a list at all.

It's 100% self-imposed.

Perceiving the person you want to be

1. Take off the glasses

The first step is knowing what identities you've already taken on and what rules they come with.

Acknowledging you have glasses on can be hard. Like I said, the longer you have them on, the more like you they start to feel.

Change is impossible if you still see the world or yourself in the same way.

You may realize that you've been living life through rules that don't serve the person you want to be or what you want to do.

You'll get stuck perceiving yourself through that frame rather than one that allows you to be the person you want to be.

Take a look at the rules and decide which ones, if any, are working in your favor.

2. Choose your words carefully

Many people I know catastrophize.

They make a mountain out of a molehill - something so small becomes a big threat.

I know people's days have gone to ruin because they dropped a glass and it broke.

Why does this happen?

We all experience failure on a day-to-day basis - it's natural.

What needs emphasis, though, is that we can't make that part of our personality.

It's right to fail. In most cases, it's even better to fail.

Yet, there's a difference between failure and being a failure.

The ones I was speaking about above fall into the category of people who, when they fail, believe they're failures.

They take on the act of failing as a personal trait.

If you're a failure, you're always going to look for reasons to affirm that you're a failure.

This is why it's important to make sure that we're using language correctly, in our favor.

Use words that support who you want to be.

Reframe unsuccessful attempts.

"I didn't get the job because I'm not good enough" becomes "that wasn't the right job for me".

Getting rejected by your crush is simply "there's someone better out there for me".

3. Flip your scripts

This might actually be the easiest part.

Simply do it - act like the person that you want to be.

It'll feel weird. It'll take conscious effort. You'll get it wrong sometimes.

But you don't ever get better at anything by not doing it.

You can even start with it being a joke.

As long as you're building those positive circuits, you're on your way to living your best life.

For example: if it's abundance you want, see yourself as a wealthy person.

But you must believe these things. The Universe (as well as you) will see right through you if you aren't fully confident.

This comes through constant reinforcement.

Affirmations while our brain is in a more susceptible state (when you're sleepy) are extremely powerful.

Your brain's ability to rationally question new information is inhibited when you're tired. So mornings and nights are great times for reprogramming.

You'll soak up the words like a sponge, and it'll be easier to believe these things.

Thank you so much for taking the time to read this, and I hope that you found useful information in it.

Life is one big learning game and a constant process of breaking down and rebuilding, but you get to choose how to rebuild.

Until next time, with love,

Noah